TOW #21 – Article: “Why I Can Never Order From Chipotle Again”

Quiet Revolution

"Why I Can Never Order From Chipotle Again"

By Monica Bielanko

In the spirit of Cain’s Quiet Revolution, I decided to do my next TOW on a Quiet Revolutionary’s writing.  Monica Bielanko’s article, an account of one of the simplest, but also one of the most terrifying, acts of daily life for an introvert, is one that stood out to me the most.  Hilarious story aside, Bielanko articulates a feeling that I originally thought only I felt, but Bielanko reveals that this feeling is actually shared by millions of introverts, and non-introverts, across the world.  Through several short and humorous narrations of past experiences, Bielanko uses inductive reasoning in order to humbly impart advice for dealing with an overwhelming anxiety to please people. 

The first eight words perfectly capture my own anxieties when ordering at restaurants.  Bielanko honestly and out rightly confesses: “I am terrified of failing the Chipotle guy” (1).  Personally, I have never confessed my absolute need to please everyone, since the typical response would be, “Why do you care what other’s think? -- You’re too sensitive…” But Bielanko follows up with her rational for caring about botching a Chipotle order: “My brain will replay my perceived humiliation on an endless loop until I am certain I can never return to the establishment where the scene of my crime occurred” (7), clarifying what I could never put into words. 

Besides Chipotle, Bielanko shares an anecdote about going through a McDonald’s drive-through with her mother.  When she once received a meagerly filled box of fries, her mother demanded more fries, which caused Bielanko “to stare intensely at the ground while attempting to harness any ESP powers I might have had within my being so that I could mentally telepath an apology to the person my mother was giving her piece of mind to… mostly saying ohgodsorrysorrysorrygodohgodsorry over and over again in my mind” (12).   Another instance happened at a restaurant, when she ordered shrimp and got scallops, and rather than telling the waiter her order had been mixed up and ruining the night with “debilitating anxiety over his certain annoyance” (13), Bielanko at the scallops.  At a Starbucks once, Bielanko asked the server to repeat her question, resulting in Bielanko thinking “It’s ruined. My coffee is ruined. I hate everything. I want to go home” (22).  

Bielanko ends full circle, returning to ordering at Chipotle, coming to the realization that most of her reactions internally were overreactions, and physically underreactions.  Instead of allowing our amygdalae to overwhelm our brains with anxiety, we can train our prefrontal cortexes to calm those traumatizing anticipations and focus on what may actually happen.   

TOW #20 – IRB: “Quiet” (Part 1)

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking

By Susan Cain

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, by Susan Cain, breaks down the social stigma of introversion with the humble voice of an introvert, being one herself, and the support of scientific research and experiences of countless other well-known leaders, but not well-known introverts.

As an introvert myself, I personally identify with Cain’s descriptions of the behavior of introverts and highly-sensitive individuals.  She matter-of-factly recounts her anxiety from “the crucible of Harvard Law School” and her days as a Wall Street lawyer negotiating with “disgruntled investment bankers,” but beyond her credibility from personal experience, Cain’s ethos stems from research.  In each of her chapters, inductive reasoning is her method of argument, as she refutes popular perspectives by citing multiple instances from the past and present. 

Society generally views Harvard Business School as the school where students are educated to become the next leaders of the world by pushing students to socialize and speak with conviction.  However, Cain’s visit to the school reveals the flaws of extraverted leadership, exposed during the Subarctic Survival Situation, when one group failed because the vocal students did not consider the ideas of the quiet, but most experienced, student.  She then backs up this instance with a study from UC Berkeley that found the most famous, confident prognosticators (considered to be natural leaders) to make the worst predictions.  And in the U.S Army, this phenomenon is also a “powerful artifact” in the military, known as “the Bus to Abilene,” in which one soldier makes a suggestion and the rest follow just because he/she was the most vocal.  Unfortunately, society clearly correlates confident public speaking skills to strong leadership, clearly shown in the process companies use to vet ideas.  Employees are expected to present their ideas and then asked questions on the spot.  The few people who survived such questioning were found to be “the best presenters” (53), but they did not necessarily have the best ideas.

By exposing the holes in society’s current expectations for great leaders, Cain creates spaces for introversion to shine through with qualities distinct to introverts.  From numerous studies, our high-sensitivity and short SERT genes correspond to “higher performance on a wide range of cognitive tasks” (113).  Drawing from the incredible acts and achievements of Rosa Parks, Eleanor Roosevelt, Steve Wozniak, Craig Newmark, Al Gore, introversion is undoubtedly not a lesser personality than extraversion.  However, in all her praise for introverts, it is important to note that Cain never comes off as condescending or critical of extraverts.  She acknowledges that we have “selfish streaks like everyone else” (141).  Her humbleness is a significant part of her argument for a balanced society that accepts and amplifies the strengths of introverts and extraverts to make up for each of our shortcomings.